And all she said appears to be
The actor told the Tamil edition of India Today that society should free itself from “outdated thinking that a woman has to be a virgin at the time of her marriage”.For heaven's sake, it was for the sex and the single woman survey. What was she expected to say? That such surveys are violation of Tamil Womanhood?
“They should know to protect themselves from pregnancy and AIDS if they chose to have sex before marriage. Educated men these days do not expect their spouses to be virgins at the time of marriage” (Hindustan Times)
Pushed to the back foot, Kushboo has been quick to offer a clarification. She has said 'it was indeed unfortunate that a big issue has been made out of my interview. I find no wrong in whatever I had spoken about pre-marital sex. In the changing scenario, whatever I spoke holds true. Needless controversy has been with my interview'. (IndiaGlitz)
It is quite evident that the parties involved in the anti-Khushboo protest are using her statements as an opportunity for revenge. An apology for an apology apparently.
In a social environment where Tamil Womanhood is cheaply violated in a majority of the movies, where no double entendre spares a woman, it is indeed quite a sudden awakening to the true value of Tamil Womanhood - where were the broomsticks all this while O Tamil Mothers?
16 comments:
OMG Echo!! This issue was altogether presented in a different manner by SUN TV yesterday. People who watched the SUN TV news would have been made to believe that Khusboo had remarked something bad about Tamil womanhood and there were large scale protests against her. They never mentioned that Khusboo had expressed her views for a survey. I discussed this issue with my friend during lunch and that friend mentioned that this news was only shown in SUN TV. I was asking my friend whether it is right of Khusboo to make such remarks when she was the one who raised strong voices against Thangar Bacchan. Now after reading your post, I agree with Khusboo’s remarks. She has all the right in the world to express her views for a survey. I had read another survey in Outlook regarding a similar subject. Anonymous persons from all the metros had expressed their views and those subjects were even more delicate than this one. So why make a big issue on Khusboo’s views. I think the entire Khusboo’s comments is being politicized because she is a host for a program in JAYA TV which happens to be the competitor for SUN TV (both in politics and media). The protests showed in the news were carried out by PMK( a DMK ally) party. SUN TV and JAYA TV are political channels and they both are biased.
Both the channels are widely watched and most people believe what they see and hear from these channels. Media should be more responsible in giving the right news to the people.
amk - thanks for your comment. Media these days is dominated by political parties whose main aim is to use them as vehicles for propagating whatever the parties deem fit. Slow poisoning of the mass intellect with steady media feeds is a very effective way to turn the political tides one way or the other.
Smart strategy actually if you keep the integrity word out of it.
I little disagree with u'r
statement, that Tamilwomenhood
is being cheaply potrayed in most
of the films...I agree, in recent times, there is a lot of commercial compromises in terms of external glitz and glamour but womanhood I feel is more than that and I do not think there is not much violation on the "fundamentals" but yeah definitely it's not high as used to be in K.Balachander's movies ( I always adore
his fantastic dream characterization of women( Very ideal, mentally strong and determined - I remember in one of his masterpiece " aachamillai aacchamillai", the girl character ( heroine) would kill her own politically corrupted husband for the sake of doing something good for society )…
About khusboo's remarks, totally not aware and yet to read that Indiatoday before to comment on that:--))
A correction in above ..should be " I think there is "not much violation....etc
"strong positive spirit of modern womanhood" doesn't mean that women can have or support pre-marital sex.
She looks,in my eyes, a hypocrite considering that she made a big issue when Thangar Bacchan remarked allegedly labelling all actresses who “act just for money’s-sake” as being no better than prostitutes.
According to Indiaglitz ..."In her interview, Khushboo has suggested that in modern times chastity cannot be expected from girls.
"...
is she trying to say that losing virginity is 'modern'?
In my opinion, things like this, pre-marital sex, are highly situational or circumstantial(good or bad thats a different story). It can happen any time, past , present or future.
It should not be associated with 'modern times/world'.
It just sends the wrong message.
I think the people will not leave her until she makes a public apology.
This is a 'sidekick' to my previous comment.
The number of people who participate in the protest rally...is the number of unemployed people in tamilnadu.
On a related note, The media is trying to increase their market reach thru the sexually explicit material. Recently one of the latest issues of a magazine came with a detailed sex survey. I found it was really surprising that the same magazine last year published almost same content , probable changes were only the statistics they presented.
Another thing which caught my eye was another magazine a real competitor to the above one also came with a similar survey. So I think it's just another gimmik to increase the circulation and marketing. The more people talk about these things the more the media gets marketed. So let's put a full stop for such thoughts. :))
Good th c that someone cared to voice their opinion.I have Never understood(noe did i care to understand) This NORM setting attitude for girls. A guy can be all that he wants to be.He will turn into a sinceredevoted hubby after marriage, irrespective of his hundred affairs. But a girl with a broken heart ,wounded soul, and used body , becomes an outcast .What sort of chauvinism is this. Why shouldn't premarital sex be alrite for the girls. if they are alrite with it its fine. Its their life they get to choose. Nobody can place a demand, they can only suggest.N when someone sensible comes along the way , y r they required to apologise for wat they feel is right.Freedom to express their thought is fundamental. Why this society chooses to ridicule few who r necessary. I am not thinkin of a Roarkian world, but def not one thats prejudiced, and full of rules set for women.
Its high time society wakes up to welcome the BHARATIYAR KANDA PUDUMAI PENN. Especially media people , newscasters who influence the mind set of people carry the responsibility to the society on their shoulders. Let them not be prejudiced and take us back to premedieval era.
Wake up Chennai.
Anonymous,
Iam not supporting guys, but I wanted to tell you...
"Two wrongs do not make a Right"
And by the way ...BHARATIYAR KANDA PUDUMAI PENN doesn't have pre-marital sex.
"Wake up Chennai"
Wake up?
Wake up to what?
Extra-Marital affairs?
'Development' and 'Modern' should be like...how to make this world a better place to live.
If you have problem with guys have pre-marital affairs and if you think it's wrong, you should try to address that issue. And not do it yourself.
It's like saying, "hey my next door neighbor is a thief, so from today I will also steal."
What logic is this?
The thing that differentiates humans and animals is the human's ability to judge what is right and what is wrong and act accordingly. If we lose that, then how different are we from them?
Thank you all for sounding out your thoughts. Here are my reactions:
a) I think Khushboo's statements were not marketing pre-marital sex as the only right way to be. She seems to have said that in these modern times, pre-marital sex exists (of course it does. In a closet society, not many will admit to it in print and have men riding donkeys in front of their house). And safety in pre-marital sex is important. Secondly, if the Indian male is offended by her statement about educated men not expecting their wives to be virgins, then there is a civilized way to express disagreement. Instigating other women to pick up broomsticks or making a man wear a salwar and parade outside Khushboo's home on a donkey is definitely not civilized.
b) The much respected India Today's very similar sex surveys within a span of a year does seem like sensationalism. But maybe it is also a reflection of 'India Today'
c) The larger issue here is freedom of expression. Khushboo's relevant remarks in the context of a sex survey has been blown out of context and proportion and interpreted as a statement on Tamil Womanhood. That is sad. She was merely expressing an opinion, which, in a democracy is a basic right.
d) In a large and disparate country like India, any generalization cannot stand for the entire population. It can only be representative of a segment. So, in the context of the pre-marital sex and the single woman, it is obvious that it exists. It does not mean that all educated women choose to lose their virginity. If something exists, you acknowledge its existence and face up to it in a mature manner. To the credit of some media houses, they do try to bring to light a lot of aspects of India. If pre-marital sex is one such aspect, acknowledge it or refute it. But do so in a civilized manner.
e) Idealization of women: Forget Pudhumai Penn (New Woman) or Parambariya Penn (Traditional Woman) - just look at the woman part. She exists as a separate species and like an ordinary man, goes through different stages and motions. So any issue that she faces can be talked about in order to spread awareness and encourage expression of individual opinion. In that context, the whole Khushboo affair is a non-issue.
f) Along with the 'Wake Up', time to also say 'Grow Up'.
Well said echo.The whole drama
is needless.But the very statement
"educated women..." I feel needs to be viewed in two diff dimensions.( paper and reality).
whatever holds good in paper may
not work out in reality and it's
upto individuals to draw their own conclusions,interpretations from..
My straight forward question is that “why only one TV channel is showing broom sticks..?? Are these brooms band in other channels??”
This is a very absolute statement “An Apology for an apology”. Single man (OMG.. I can not mention the name) is using the power of media to show that, even a single Apology costs a way too much.
When a women who does not belongs to Tamil Nadu, acting well and won the heart of whole Tamil Nadu.. She got appreciated.
When a women who does not belongs to Tamil Nadu, had a good public relationship and conducted shows to help others, she got appreciated.
When a women who does not belongs to Tamil Nadu, behaved smart in the public and helped public to understand their problems and did lot of counseling to improve their life and life style, she got appreciated.
After all this appreciation why the public is not thinking that Kushboo will not give away such statements in a media which is prone to create a false image for her as a popular person in Tamil Nadu..
BTB its an individual's right to express his/her own view on a survey and no one have any right to appose it in a cheep way like this, since because they have a popular channel and can reach the public in a real quick way. Media is like a virus these days, and the spreading of this virus rate is too high and no medication found till now. :( THESE VIRUS ARE VERY HARMFUL
this is nice issue. (not thekushboo part) but of what women r facing today.
When i said Wake up Chennai it was meant to understand that GIRLS are humans too. They have feelings that r ought be considered too. They have the freedom of expression, they can b what they want to b, society cannot specify rigid norms for women. Nobody can claim this is how a person should behave otherwise we would all turn out b clones in the vast of humanity.
Individuality the right to make our own decisions , a girl needn't adjust to the surroudings she doesn't fit in,This forcing curbs the individuality of people.
If we r gonna b be thought how to live every step of our way then WE DONT GET TO LIVE OUR OWN LIFE.
This is not to whether i support premarital sex or not. EVERYONE has thier own moral code ( or should have ) and as long as their code of conduct doesn't violate the rights of others around them or curb the intrests (true intrests which lead to good cause) then everybody gets to choose their life. Who r others to decide how a person behaves in their private affairs. Society can and should impose restrictions only if it affects the mass of humanity or atleast one single person. Nobody's private life affects anobody else's other than thier own.
People r responsible for thier own actions whether they r right or worng is entirely up to them to decide .Premarital sex is ok if the individual feels it to be so.Coz ITS NOT gonna affect any the other persons life other than their own. Who r we TO pass a judgement on that?
A person has the freedom of thought .WE will accept pretense and accept a false statement if it happens to agree with the most in the society. But when a person happens to be bold v treat it diffent.When it is what they think y shouldn't v at the least listen to what they r sayin.Acceptance of it is again an individual's right ( not societal norm).
I don't know whether Bharatiyar kanda pudumaai penn is in favour of premariatl sex.But i do know that she is unique , makes her own decisions ,does not bend her individuality to satisfy society ,believes in freedom. (PLEASE DON'T MISINTERPRET FREEDOM AS HAVIN PREMARITAL SEX AND MAKE IT SOUND CHEAP)The question is whether shegets to choose whst's instore for her life.(be it caeer , be it love ,be it anything else too).IT SHOULD BE SHE WHO GETS TO DECIDE.not anyone else on earth.I don't want cultural stereo types to curb her independance.
Lets not pretend to ourselves any longer as to what is good for girls and what is not.
THE SOCIOTY SHOULD WAKE UP TO LET WOMEN VOICE THEIR OPINION even when r not accorfding to the consensus.
That is wat IS WAKE UP CHENNAI.
to let women live for themselves (atleast for a while, coz nobody else can live her life for her)
Hey Anonymous:
Clap, clap, clap for
"This is not to whether i support premarital sex or not. EVERYONE has thier own moral code ( or should have ) and as long as their code of conduct doesn't violate the rights of others around them or curb the intrests (true intrests which lead to good cause) then everybody gets to choose their life." - I totally agree.
Firstly lets ignore the the 25Rs + 1 packet Biriyani broom sticks laden crowd. They could have at the least cleaned the road for god's sake.
The sheer politically vested interests have finally succeeded in deteriorating Kushboo's image by (may be intentionally) bringing words of her mouth. And we are here discussing Pudhumai Penn.
As we see the time scale the women's lifestyle has been gradually improving and is definitely on the right track. We have lot more economic and social issues like poverty, illiteracy, un-employment, corruption, infrastructure to worry about and we have to shift our thoughts to those places.
@anon : I guess more women folks were against Kushboo than men. So I choose to conclude that women hamper "freedom" of other women in the society.
And K, I choose to let this issue rest in peace at this point though I am sorely tempted to take you on the 'women hamper freedom of other women' part. But there is only so much of a farce that one can chew on and debating your statement will be getting into another one.
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